Raising A Puppy

Training a puppy is like having a newborn baby. It's something that one should think deeply about as they are oohing over that precious puppy face. I'm here to give you an example of just what I'm talking about.
Imagine waking up every three hours in the night just to make sure your two month old puppy can use the bathroom no matter the weather. Then training them as if they are a toddler, teaching them not to bite or chew on shoes or people. Potty training all over again, making sure they go fifteen minutes after eating or drinking. Watching them like a hawk to make sure they don't end up with something in their mouth that could choke them. The relief of nap time just around the corner (because you are hopefully crate training your puppy).
There's the stress, now here's the best part. They always love you and though they can be ornery, they stay close to your side. They lay at your feet and sometimes just want to be held. A puppy is wonderful entertainment when you only have one child. The smile on your child's face when he/she runs around outside playing with the puppy is priceless.

So think deeply and be prepared for the work you have to put into a puppy before you whimsically buy one. Just remember they are worth the time and effort and having a puppy helps prolong your lifespan. I love my puppy and can't wait to get home to play with him after a long day's work.

Addicted To The Blog

A song is now stuck in my head, Might as well face it you're addicted to... my blog?

I am pleased with myself as I sit in front of the computer with my latte in hand, brainstorming on a new blog idea when I receive an alert. I have one message waiting.
It reads: What, no blog today?

At first I am baffled. I had written a blog and sent it early in the day. I knew it went out later than usual, but it should have shown up by now. I skimmed through the recent blogs and realize that it was backdated by two weeks. I fixed the date and resent it.
A few minutes later, another message: Thank you.

A message like that keeps me writing with a smile as well as it keeps me on my toes to make sure I don't miss a beat!

Death By Cycle

Death By Cycle is a book inspired by Lisa the cycle instructor. In this book Lisa opens the cycle doors with a warm and comforting smile. She is a tiny thing who looks harmless and just as bubbly as can be, luring you into the cycle room. As soon as the class is full she shuts the door and locks it. Her sweet voice has turned ferocious as she cracks the whip on her students. Sweat pouring down their faces, they beg for water.
A diabolical laugh escapes her as she reminds the class "Today is all about me. Not you. Now ISOLATION!"
The groaning begins and so does the plot. Lisa sits back on her bike and picks up her Grape Powerade Zero.
Before she takes a drink she shouts out "I want seventy percent and pedal faster!"
Again the groaning begins as they comply to her request.
One lady in her blue workout outfit feels faint and slows down. "Oh please don't let her see me slow down."
Lisa takes a Texas size gulp of her Powerade and notices the lady slowing down. Lisa starts to shout but then chokes. Her hands fly up to her throat and she stops pedaling. The class is so intense on pleasing their instructor they don't take notice. Lisa stiffens and falls sideways to the ground unconscious.
The lady in blue, we will call her Amy, screams. Everyone turns to her and she starts pointing towards Lisa, unable to speak. One by one heads turn towards Lisa.
The fire fighter is the first to jump off the bike and runs over to her. "She's not breathing. What happened to her?"
No one speaks. JJ, the fire fighter, turns to Amy. "What did you see?"
"Sh-sh-sh"
"Duh she fell off the bike. She's not breathing," Andrea says and rolls her eyes.
"Geez Andrea, let's just be ruthless." Leanna smirks and hits Andrea in the arm.
"Ow," Andrea whines.
"Oh please I barely hit you."
"Ladies, shouldn't we be focused on Lisa?"
"You're the fire fighter, call somebody," Leanna says shaking her head.
"How did she croak?" Asked an unknown lady in the back row.
"I don't know. I didn't look at her for fear she'd make me pedal harder," Austin answered.
Silence filled the room once more.

The question is, who done it?"
Was it Amy the girl in blue since she was the first to notice? Or maybe that mysterious somebody in the back row? Could it have been the fire fighter Austin? Or maybe the two mouthy sarcastic girls? Or maybe it was just a fluke accident when she began bossing around the class while taking that large gulp which stole her breath and her life?

I guess we'll never know.

*Disclaimer-- this is a fictional story created by me and the cycle crew (who refused to let me use their real names) inspired by Lisa the slave driving cycle instructor.
HAHA! We love you Lisa!

Snowy Day Fun

The frigid temperature didn't keep my warm and cheerful thoughts from flooding my mind. I love watching the snow fall while drinking hot chocolate near the fireplace. I'm ecstatic and can't wait to build a snowman. I encourage my son to bundle up.
"It's time to play in the snow!"
With a scarf, gloves, stocking cap and a huge coat, we head out to shovel the driveway.

I snicker as I gather snow in my gloves and turn to my son. I throw a snowball and laugh as it falls apart before it reaches him. The snow is too soft to build a snowman or have a snowball fight. Yet we gather snow for the snowman's base anyway.

I turn around when I hear him snicker. A shovel full of snow is heading my way and I am covered before I can move. I jump up laughing as I shake off the snow and chase after him. He laughs and throws the shovel down on the ground. I gather up snow in both hands and he runs as fast as he can while I chase him, throwing snow at his back. He loses his balance and falls into the snow face first and I slide to a stop falling down on my bottom. We can't stop laughing and decide it's time to make snow angels.

I love playing in the snow with my little guy.

Friends For A Reason

Have you ever wondered why some people come into your life for a short time while others stay your entire lifetime?

I believe it's a time of need when most people come into your life. The times you need someone to pick you up when you have fallen or someone to show you that life is amazing. Maybe they are here just for special occasions. It's not that you mean to let them fade, but life presents it. You start a new job or they pick up a new hobby. Relationships end and new ones begin. You move across town and change schools. Once you have met these wonderful people, you remember them forever.

At point in my life, I had friends that came out of nowhere when I needed them the most. Though I didn't know at that point just how much I needed them. We had many girls night outs including rock band nights that lasted until sunrise or just sitting at a restaurant bar watching football games while talking about life and laughing so hard it brought tears to our eyes. There were gym partners as well as coffee or lunch dates. I also had friends who just wanted to dance. Then there were a couple of really good friends who lent their shoulder so I could cry. I would do the same for them at any hour of any day.

My life began to change for the better. I moved out of one house and into another. My son changed schools and I started a new job. Life began to get busy when I added a second class for my own schooling. Time was limited for friends when school began. And then I met someone special. My focus was hazy as I fell in love and my friends fell further back than I had meant.

Friends are friends for life and I think of my friends new and old often. I reminisce of the long rock band nights and the laughs over chips and salsa. I smile when I think about how much I have grown into a strong women because of their support. I know that we will be friends for life in my heart even if I don't see them again. Though I am sure that I will see them when Summer arrives.

Cat Lover Gone Dog?

Oh my... what has happened to me that I would let go of a precious kitty just to get a puppy? I have no idea! This boyfriend of mine has truly become a bad influence as of late. I have sat around playing the Wii and slept longer hours. I also cut my gym time in half and now a dog?!

I have always loved and owned pets. Dogs, cats, fish and even a rabbit. Of all the pets I have owned, cats were my preference. They were playful yet slept a lot. I didn't have to change out gallons of water, just filled up the water bowl. Potty training was a cinch. Dogs are great companions, but playtime is rough with teeth bigger and sharper than a cat's teeth.

So how did I turn from wanting a cat to a dog?
I went to the Humane Society to look for a possible companion for my son and I. I played with cute and cuddly kittens, but non caught my eye. I walked around looking at the puppies, still thinking I should wait for the perfect kitten until I saw Bob, a five month old Labrador Retriever.
With a silky jet black coat and the perfect puppy face I stared at him. He began to bark as if to say "Please take me home. I don't like it here."
"No. No way. Not a dog," I thought and walked a few feet away. He yelped a bit louder. I looked over my shoulder and into his sad golden eyes. He laid his head down on his paws, staring at me, melting my heart. That look made it impossible to walk away. I imagined taking walks in the park or running around in the backyard playing fetch. I smiled thinking of him curling up by my feet while I worked on the computer or watched television. I thought of my son having a pet that would last a long time. One that would greet him at the door after school ready to play. A pet that would love and entertain him and he would do the same in return.
I wanted him at that moment.

Back on Track

I didn't realize how easy it was to fall back on track in less than a week. It's been a wonderful site to get back to what is important and feeling like I'm getting a lot accomplished. Not only have I seen a change in my daily habits but I have been budgeting and finding more useful ways to spend money. Maybe winter has something to do with it. You know, not wanting to get out in the cold unless I absolutely have to.

The gym has been my only challenge. I would prepare myself to go, but something always came up. The good news, I'm on a roll again. I even went to the gym by myself when ice was present. I am proud of myself because driving on ice is something that has always scared me.

Getting back into writing feels natural and easy. A week ago I thought I'd run out of topics again. Then I realized, not every topic has to be nonfiction. Writing from the heart is great. However, writing for fun is even better.

Lost In Love

Over the last couple of weeks my mood has soured and I was clueless. I blamed it on stress and the weather which is not the entire truth. I haven't felt like this in about a year. It dawned on me as I drove home from the east side of town I lost sight of who I was. I have no one to blame but myself.

How did I lose me? I lost me when I found true love. I never felt love that is so amazing until six months ago. I found it and let it take over. I didn't want to do anything but stay lost in love. My motivation for the gymnasium and writing disappeared almost completely. Sadly, now I feel the effects of forgetting what I loved before the romance came into my life.

But I don't want to let go of this wonderful love. Though if I don't start to focus soon, then the love could suffer. It will never fade away, but my happiness will only be part-time. This is not loves fault. The signs were there and communicated, I just ignored them. I didn't want to lose any moment with love. I still don't, but if I am to be happy I will have to split time between love, writing, and the gymnasium equally.

Circle Of Trust

Why is it so hard to make decisions of the heart? Especially when everything has gone smooth and feels so right. I believe it's the fear of hurting the one you love.

I want to forever be wrapped up in my true love's arms. To wake up and see his smiling face as his eyes are alight while he murmurs softly, "I love you" and kisses my forehead or lips. I can't wait to snuggle into his warmth and sleep soundlessly throughout the night. I want to feel the "circle of trust" on my finger and know that we are joined forever.

I know it's possible to have all that I list above. I know that it's all within grasp. So why do I fear the love and devotion of that one special person? Or is it that knowing I could have all that I want but fear losing the "circle of trust."

Being completely comfortable with one's true love is amazing. But how do I ensure that I am offered the "circle of trust" if I am willing to be this comfortable and give in to my lover without hesitation or boundaries?

Why is the "circle of trust" so important? It's forever joined with the one you love most. It's being proud of standing next to the one you love and building the foundation together. It's knowing that true love has found you. It's comfortable. It's forever.

Have you ever wondered why you say the things you do to your children?

I never believed I would hear myself say anything similar to my mother's words until I had a child of my own. The sad thing, you don't mean to say some of the things you say. It's just a heated moment that made you speak before thinking. Then you wish you could take it back. But you can't.
My mind is always working. As a matter of fact you can say that I'm an over-thinker. With that, I start to think about things that I shouldn't. I begin to feel guilty for things out of my control.
To make matters worse, my son asks just a simple question daily, "Is it dad's day?" I have done so many things to help him know which day. Yes, it plays on my mind because I begin to wonder, does he not want to be with me? And to make things worse, he says "Yay, there's still snow. When I go to dad's I can play in the snow!" He is so excited and I break down. Now I feel that I am no fun. I tried to get him to go out with me for two days to build a snowman, but he didn't want to. My mental state today is shaky as I realize that I am" just mom." I will not be the fun one because of the way visitation works. I am the one who has to keep stability. Is that really such a sad thing? To know that when he is an adult the structure I provided for him will only help him build character in a positive manner.
I wish I could keep telling myself to stay strong but I am weakening. I am sure he doesn't mean it how it sounds and if he does, at least I know he is having fun when he is not with me.

Unanswered Questions

Nothing like waking up at four thirty in the morning plagued with unanswered questions. The worse part, who can you share this with? Or who would you want to?

The questions that find me at this hour are ones that I have been needing answered. But the answer isn't simple. I love my friends and family and especially my boyfriend, but there is no one that can help me with these questions. Why bring it up when there is no relief?

I hope that one day soon these questions will be answered so I can get a full night's sleep. I'm tired of being plagued with unanswered questions. It's especially hard when there is no one to hold you in the night when they hit. I pray for peace and answers as I try to close my eyes and drift off to sleep.

Finally Hitting Girlfriend Status

After five and a half months I sighed with relief when he says "You can be my girlfriend."
"Yay!" I said and gave him a quick kiss. He leaned in for another but his little girl stood watching so I shied away.

We have been steadily growing closer.Though we realized that everything felt right and that we could see forever, she didn't agree. Honestly, neither did my son.
Our children never had to worry about sharing their time with us. Even when all four of us were together we always kept our distance. Yet would sneak a kiss when they weren't paying attention. We didn't sit next to each other on the couch but kept them in the middle as we watched Scooby Doo. There were no sleepovers though they asked. We felt it best to slowly introduce this new life of ours. It was hard to see them go on many occasions, but it was appropriate. Then the day came for the first sleepover. They pulled out air mattresses and watched television until they fell asleep under his supervision. I retired upstairs to my room.
At this point, his daughter had made it very clear I was still only his best friend. My son however said that it was okay just no kissing. That was quite all right with me. Once his daughter caught wind that my son was fine with us being boyfriend and girlfriend, she caved.
She said "Okay, she can be your girlfriend. Now can we go to her house and play the Wii?"

Solitude

I sat in solitude without an opportunity of escaping. No internet. No television. No one to converse with. I stared up at the ceiling counting the tiny shiny speckles. Boredom hit hard. I sat up and looked at the room around me. Just an ordinary room with off-white walls that needed painted and no pictures to invent a story. The room was lonely. Empty. I saw a pencil and a notepad sitting on the nightstand. I sighed and looked away.
"No." I said shaking my head. "Not today. I'm tired. I just don't feel like it."
I laid back down and stared at my hands. My mind began to wander. After an eternity, I realized I was biting my nails. Thought after thought swarmed my mind. I wanted to scream.
"Not today, dear friend. I'm tired."
The more I fought the urge to grab the pencil, the more it talked to me. I jumped out of bed and paced the floor. There had to be a way to escape. I looked outside. Snow piled up high against this cabin. The truck was buried under the white blanket.
I plopped back down on the bed. I cringed as I looked over at the notepad. Why was it so hard to pick it up anymore? It called to me all morning when there was nothing to do. I laid back down and closed my eyes. I tossed and turned. I covered my head with the blanket.
I threw the blanket off me as I sat up. "Fine." I said and grabbed the pencil.
As I held the pencil, it's familiarity came back to me in a flood. I picked up the notepad and flipped to a blank page. As I wrote I wondered why did I fight the urge to start again when that was all I wanted to do before.

Change For The Better

For over a month I had been alcohol free. Not that I ever abused it, but I did enjoy a glass of wine or a beer after my son went to bed. I loved to dance on the weekends, when my son was with his father, and enjoy a couple of social drinks at the bar while I twirled around on the dance floor. But I learned that dancing just isn't the same without my boyfriend, so I quit going unless he was there. Instead of drinking alcohol, I found I enjoyed grape juice or Dr Pepper while we played the Wii with his daughter. When Christmas came, I had my son and I had no desire to have a drop of alcohol.

This last weekend I went out dancing with my boyfriend and our friends for the first time in a month or longer. First thing I wanted when we arrived was a drink. So I got one. But I really didn't care for it. I nursed it as I socialized and danced. Then I realized the only thing I wanted to do was to dance. So I drank water. But I was yawning by ten that evening and you know they teased me. Never did I yawn on a night out. But I just wasn't into it. We tried again to go out the following night. Again I didn't want to drink but socialize and dance. Again I found myself yawning by ten and ready to call it an evening.

I am glad that I have found more important things to do in life than drink at the bar. I have always been a mother first and I always will be. But now I think I will be even more into family, if possible, than ever. With a steady boyfriend who has children of his own, I find that hanging with the family is a lot more fun on the weekends than going out and drinking the night away.

Date Night

I snuggled up on the couch with my honey and watched Date Night. This is one of the funniest movies I have seen in such a long time.

I have to admit when Mark Wahlberg opens the door without a shirt, I drooled. Who wouldn't?! Of course my honey noticed and said I could start working out and have pecks like that. If that would make his confidence arise, more the power to him. But then I would be right alongside him in the gym toning up my stomach until I had that six-pack we all dream of having. But honestly, it's not worth it in the end. I like him just the way he is. I want to enjoy working out and toning up but not worry constantly about my appearance. And he looks great!

I believe everyone, if they have the desire, should take some time and exercise just to raise those endorphins because it makes you happier. It's not about being thin or built. It's about feeling better about yourself.
Besides, I don't really want every woman staring at my man. I mean if they do, okay. I'll just make sure I kiss him and stay close so they know who landed that hunk.

The Weekly List

Here it comes, the year to relax and have fun. But how can I do that with all the chores piling up against me? That's easy. Start from scratch and make a weekly list of chores and manage my time. I think this is the best way to get back on track with a bang! It may seem childish to make such a list, but just think, if I know what's on my agenda that day I will enjoy my evening when my chores are complete. I will have more free time in the end and I will feel accomplished.

The best part of making this chore list is that I plan to start my day with writing exercises. That means I should always be caught up on blogs and feel the creativity spark once again. I can't wait to see if I can keep this up for an entire year!

Feeling the Holidays

With the holidays finally over, I try to put on my favorite pair of jeans. Oh no! I can't pull them all the way up! This is truly a crisis now. I spent over three quarters of the year working out and watching my calorie intake just so I could wear these jeans comfortably. Now I feel the need to get back into the gym immediately.

When looking back on those fabulous days I spent sitting in front of the Wii or television eating every piece of bread or cheese or even better cake, I realize those were times of pure relaxation, or more accurately laziness for me. Something I haven't done in a long time.
So I will forgive myself for over-indulging this once and head back into the gym so I can wear my favorite pair of jeans again by February.

4 A.M. Wakeup Call

It's four a.m. and I wake to the light creaking of the floor. I smile as my heart warms knowing my honey is sneaking upstairs to cuddle with me for a few hours while his daughter is sleeping downstairs on the air mattress. Then I hear water running and he is speaking to his daughter. I sigh and close my eyes. There will be no snuggling this morning.
My eyes pop open when he peeks his head in the doorway. "I need to grab a towel, she just puked all over the place."
I tell him where the towels are and groan a little as I climb out of bed. I don't want to see but I know I should help out. I head down the stairs but the smell is too much. I clamp my hands over my mouth and rush back upstairs into the bathroom near my room. I start to heave and think "Oh no... I'm going to lose it!" I close my eyes and take deep breaths putting my mind in a happier place.
I splash water on my face and look in the mirror. "Get a grip, Lyana. You can do this. Just put your mind somewhere else."
Now confident that I can help out, I walk down the stairs and begin stripping the sheets off the mattress. He is right behind me and I can see his disgust as well. I laugh.
"What a wake up call," he says with a chuckle.
"Yeah, not quite the wake up call I was hoping for," I said with a wink.

Have you ever met someone and realized your world could revolve around them? I never thought that possible until five almost six months ago when I realized how important love is and how much time I want to spend with my boyfriend. The hard part is remembering that when he is free to hang out, I still have to do the important things I do when my son isn't with me. I have never been a procrastinator until now.

For me, that is good and bad. With only four months left of school, my focus is anywhere but on my assignment. That is the bad part. But the good is me not being so anal about my house. In the past if it didn't sparkle in every room, I would get grumpy. Now, I keep it a home. Sometimes the counter top has papers and toys piled up unlike before. And the basement actually looks like we have fun instead of having every toy put back in it's proper place.

As far as writing, I find myself more interested in experiencing life rather than writing a dream I never thought could come true. It is healthy to get my nose out of the books and quit hiding from the world. And it's more fun to write my experiences for you to read.

I won't give up on writing, but I will make it just a part of my life so I don't miss out on the world around me. So don't worry, I will still go after my dream and get the books published. I'm just organizing my time so I get to do a little of everything.

Life is about making moments... I will still dance in the rain...

A New Year Without A Resolution?

Starting off the new year without a resolution is exactly what I have done this year. Oh my it seems I am still procrastinating! I have always had a tough time trying to decide what would be the best thing to try to accomplish for an entire year and finally I have thought of one. Quit Procrastinating.
It's time I pull myself together and get out of the clouds and accomplish what I have started. So I am going with my same idea as last year. It's time to make a list of what needs to be done, hang it on my mirror, and do it. I made it all the way until October of 2010 with this chore list. Why not try it again and see if I can make it until November or December. If I do this, I will find I have more time to relax and enjoy life rather than feel the "crunch."

My procrastinated new years resolution is: Quit Procrastinating and Organize with a chore list.