The First Fishing Trip

Taking the children fishing for the first time turned out to be more adventurous than I thought it would be. It was down right exhausting even with two adults working together to handle their needs. It was a constant battle back and forth to keep everything in order. As soon as the worm was on one hook, it was time to bait the next. Teaching them how to cast carefully was another part. As soon as one line hit the water, there was a bite. The shrill moment of catching a perch that fit a palm, lasted for a second. The second child casts, but gets their line stuck in the tree. While the perch is being released back into the water, the line is released from the tree. And then time to bait the poles again. The children were separated, one on each side of us, so that they didn't cross lines as they cast out into the lake. Another bite for one child and a little grumbling from the other child who has only caught a tree. After a few minutes he gets a bite! He's so excited that he flings his line out of the water, hooking the fish good. He listens as I teach him how to reel the line in with his perch dangling at the end of it. At least now they have both caught a cute little perch too small to eat.

After awhile things simmered down and my husband's line finally touched the water. It didn't last long before the children grew hungry and bored. They ate their chicken and played in the dirt, forgetting all about fishing. We packed up as they grew restless and headed home. After our three-hour-adventure, they were exhausted and happy and begged to go fishing again the next weekend!

Believing In Dreams

What is it about dreams that keeps you yearning for more? What is it about dreams that give you a glimpse of the future and yet does it really? How can you deny de ja vous? How can we tell if its part of our future or just a wishful moment?

My husband and I tend to differ on what our dreams mean. He believes it's just our subconscious working overtime and yet he cannot deny that some of his dreams gave him a glimpse of his future. One happened to be me. He had a dream right before he married his blonde girlfriend of three years that she wouldn't be his wife. Another woman with long brunette hair stood at the alter with him. He never understood it at the time. Many years later, I became his wife and it clicked in his mind. Yet again, that all depends on your interpretation.
I don't believe that all dreams stand for something to come. However, I do believe that our good Lord above sends me answers through my dreams.
I dreamed of a baby boy before I knew I was pregnant. I never went to see what I was having and I dreamed that he was a boy throughout my pregnancy. Today, I have a precious seven year old son. I dreamed about each of my pregnancies as I became pregnant and I also dreamed of the miscarriages right before they happened.
About fifteen years ago, I dreamed of coming home on a Greyhound bus from a vacation wearing my red sweats and feeling weary. I laughed. Several months later and after a two week vacation in Key West, the car broke down and I found myself on a Greyhound bus wearing my red sweats.
That's just a few moments in my life that something has stimulated through my dreams. I have regular occurrences. So many times it has sent me warning and when I acknowledge it, I understand.Perhaps because I feel I am close to God that theses dreams happen. Perhaps it's the Nezperce or Cherokee Indian in my blood. All I know is that I believe messages come through dreams just as well as through the mail, phone and/or email. I cannot deny that most of our dreaming is just our subconscious working overtime. Sometimes though, it has truth either plain to see or hidden deep inside them. I love waking up and trying to analyze what my dreams may mean.

Today there's not much to say. I'm still in dreamland. Not that I'm sleepy, but that I had a dream of a house and a future I am eager to begin. The house was interesting with it's endless doors down a hallway that never seemed to end. The upstairs was filled with bedrooms and the basement was a replica. Disappointingly, the kitchen never came into view and that matters most alongside the amount of bedrooms the house will provide. The house seemed humungous yet average size. It was mysterious and comforting at the same time. A feel of home yet a strangeness too. Perhaps it was just an unfamiliar place to call home. Yet a place to learn to feel welcome though I felt welcome when I walked passed the threshold. The warm tones of the house filled my heart with joy. I couldn't wait to move in and unpack the boxes.  But as in dreams, there's always something strange that happens to make you wake. As I explored deep down in the basement, a group of people sat around a table discussing the purchase of the house I had wandered into. I jumped as it startled me and woke that very moment. Perhaps that's not the house in our future. Yet it gives me that thrill of looking for the future house that would be just right for our family.

A Peek Into The Future

She stared at the fire wondering how it got to this point. She loved spending time with him, but now he wanted a relationship. Why would he push her into something serious so soon? It was just one kiss after several months of hanging out. She just found her freedom and the last thing she wanted was to lose it all over again. However, she didn't want him to walk out of her life forever. That was his style. No games. But, she wasn't playing a game. She laughed every time they were together. They were the best of friends and friendship was the most important thing to her. She couldn't lose his friendship. But a relationship? She just wasn't ready. Was she? To make matters worse, their fight last night ended with him walking out on her and their friends. He refused to answer her texts. Their friendship was over and she didn't understand why. He never once gave her an inkling to why he was so upset with her. All she wanted was to keep things as they were. Their first kiss, an amazing kiss that warmed her inside, was only two nights before their fight. Their first kiss opened up possibilities of a relationship, however nice and slow was her pace. She had built walls around her heart and refused to tear them down so quickly. Yet, she was hurting now. She needed him. He made her smile. They laughed until tears rolled down her cheeks and talked for hours on end.
When they went dancing, she danced with no one else and snuggled deeper into his arms when the song slowed. His embrace was warm and inviting. She remembered him telling her that her smile was as beautiful as she was. She looked up at him, blushing. He brushed her cheek and bent his head down as she reached up and their lips met as they slowly danced around the dance floor. Their kiss lasted an eternity before someone bumped into them. He laughed as she giggled and they continued to dance the night away. They kissed only the one kiss that happened at just the right moment. She wanted to kiss him again, but that crossed boundaries and she wasn't ready. Or was she?
She stoked the fire with tears lining her cheeks. She was afraid to love him, yet she knew she did. And now he was gone forever. There was no way to get him to respond, especially now that he was leaving town for the week. He would forget all about her in that week. If she couldn't get him to respond before he left, their friendship would end.
She looked at her phone. "One last text," she sighed. "Please talk to me. It cannot end this way."
Maybe he will respond, however, most likely it's too late. "Lord, let him respond," she whispered as she stared into the fire.

With a glass of sweet tea in her hand, she walked out onto the deck and sat in her favorite chair to watch the sun hide behind the trees. Her favorite time of night was when the wind began to chill and leaves swirled straight up in front of her and then scattered across the yard. The dry air begged for moisture though there hadn't been any in over a year. Sweat beads formed over her entire body as she sat waiting for the sun to lower. What she would give for a break from the smoldering summer heat. She closed her eyes and wondered if the rain would ever fall again. She dreamed of the wet drops soaking through her clothes and hair as she danced through the rain with thunder booming overhead. She giggled. A darkness fell over her closed eyes and she immediately opened them and smiled. A humungous dark cloud had rolled across the sky covering the sun with a promise of rain. She hoped this time the cloud would not tease her. The winds picked up and she shivered. The wind grew colder and blew harder by each minute that passed by. The cloud seemed to be making good on its promise. The sun peeked out from behind the cloud and the warmth returned. Disappointed, she looked up at the sky with a pleading look in her eyes. Another cloud rolled across the sky hiding the sun. Within minutes the entire sky grew dark and a beautiful array of pinks, blues, and purples ran along the horizon. The winds picked up speed and she heard a soft rumble. The rumble grew louder but still a serene sound. A wet drop hit her arm. She couldn't believe it. And then another smacked her forehead. She stood up and a rush of drops covered her instantly. She ran out in the yard laughing as the rain poured down on her. She danced merrily as the thunder gained a deeper voice. Lightning struck a tree near by and she ran onto the deck quickly. The storm grew with intensity bringing hail stones the size of golf balls to beat upon anything it felt. She ran for cover inside the log cabin house. The lights went out. She shrieked! She blindly reached for the wall and found her way into the bathroom and felt for the candle on the counter. She felt for the drawer and opened it, fumbling to find the lighter. Finding it, she lit the candle and carefully walked into the living room as to not spill the candle wax onto the hardwood floor. She sat watching the storm through the flickering candle light until she fell sound asleep.

Time is drawing near and my palms are sweaty. Beads are forming on the back of my neck as well as my forehead. I can't stop moving, whether it's tapping my foot or fidgeting with my hands. It's taking too long yet it's coming too soon. Do I wanna know? No. Yes. I don't know. It's killing me; the waiting. My mind plays a thousand tricks. I think too much. I get up and walk around. I'm antsy. How much longer in this dreaded silence? Do I look at the time? Yes. No. I don't wanna know. Yes, I do. Seconds tick away quickly. My heart is pounding hard in my chest. Will the answer make me smile or make my heart sink? Ugh, I want to know now!The phone rang and my hand sat on the receiver for a moment before I picked it up. "Hello? Yes, this is she. Oh, I'm sorry. I can't talk right now. I'm waiting on an important phone call." I hung up the receiver and drummed my fingers on the table. How much longer before they call? They should have called already. Does that mean the news is bad? Or will I sigh with relief? Again the phone rang. Again I hesitated before I answered. Again the wrong number. How many times will this phone ring from telemarketers? I stood and walked into the kitchen. Just as I turned on the water to wash the dishes, the phone rang. I dashed back into the living room and answered. This time it was the anticipated call I had been waiting on. I sat down on the sofa as I received the news. Shock was frozen on my face. "Thank you," I said as I hung up the phone. I sat back on the couch and stared into the mirror, yet not seeing a thing. A million questions ran through my mind. I didn't know which emotion to feel and buried my face in my hands as I cried.

An Endless List

With so much to do, where do I start? The bathroom wall paper needs removing, the shower curtain rod needs replacing, the clothes need folding, the dishes need washing, the floors need vacuuming, sweeping and mopping, the beds need making, the entire house needs dusting... The papers need filing, the desk needs organizing, the bills need paying, the computer needs updating, the printer... the printer... the blog needs writing, the book needs critiquing...The list goes on and on. Will it ever reach an end? Perhaps it's not meant to end. If there were nothing to do, boredom would come and boredom we do not need.

In the fast paced life that we live, we expect to be busy with whatever dreaded chores we have left to do. All we need is to find time to finish a project we began a month or even years ago. But how do we find the time we need? We can write a list and place it on the mirror as I have done in the past. We can tackle one chore at a time. Put a focus on an item everyday. With household chores, do a little everyday. My grandmother once told me that if I did a load of laundry each day, I would never be behind. She was right. Every day one load was washed, dried, folded and put away. Before long, the piles were too small to do a load everyday. That can even work with filing. As soon as there's something to file, take the time to do it right then and there so that it doesn't stack up. My basket is overflowing again. I dread to sit in front of the filing cabinet and file for hours. Yet had I just filed the two papers each time I had them in hand, the basket would be empty. We all have lazy days and are entitled to them. However, we also should have catch up days and stay on top of chores days too.  Why spend a whole day doing what can be done in ten minutes each day?

Day 3

My eyes are crusted with sleep and I dread getting out of this bed with the steady pitter-patter of raindrops against the window. The low rolling thunder is no help at all. It makes for a sleepy day. My alarm has been sounding louder and louder each second. I wish I didn't have to get up. Pitter-patter, pitter-patter. Yawning, I stretch my arms and legs until I shake slightly. It feels so good to stretch. I slide one leg from under the covers and I shiver. Then the next leg joins the first. I slide until my feet touch the floor and I slowly sit up. For today is Thursday. It's almost the weekend. Then I can sleep in if even for an hour longer.

The rain is falling harder and I smile. I love the rain no matter how sleepy it makes me. I love the rolling thunder and the feel of spring. It's a perfect morning to enjoy a cup of coffee in front of the fireplace and write for hours on end. When it rains so many thoughts and images rush through my mind. It's a moment of creation and the best use of my writing time.

Time has grown short just as my fingers are warmed to the keys. If only I could type the day away.

Day 2

Where do I start... oh yeah. I am awake, but barely. It seems sleep comes so easy these cold winter days. Once my toes touch the cold ceramic tile, I shiver. If I could just run back to bed. Why do I wake myself at such an early hour? The coffee is brewing and my mind is groggy yet searching for ideas. At least my fingers are typing away...

There was nothing out of the ordinary yesterday. Nothing to get jazzed about. But then I remembered something unnatural about their stares. Why did they stare at me so? I only smiled and continued my routine. Their greetings were strange as well. I didn't think about that until now. They never reached out to me the way they had yesterday. Did they find out? How? Nobody is supposed to know. Will they confront me? What will they do? What will I do? I pray that they know nothing. I pray it is just my imagination.

Time is short. I better get ready and back in uniform. I cannot act suspicious or I may not write another word. Okay. Here I go...

Day One

Day One...

"Wake up America," I say groggily.

Getting out of bed gets harder and harder each day. Which is absurd because my day used to begin at five-thirty a.m. and I was wide-eyed and bushy-tailed. Though I'm eager to write, I just need five more minutes. Five more. Before too long it's been thirty minutes and it's time to get ready for the work day ahead. I've missed my chance at writing once again. I say this more often than not.

Why is it so tough to get out of bed? Maybe it was a good dream or an intense, action-packed, dream that left me exhausted. Or perhaps its the warm body that I am snuggled up against. Yet, isn't he supposed to be out of bed already? Oh no. He's late. He's late again. How long will his boss be understanding? We are newly weds. Well, seven months had gone by. Yet, nothing has changed with our devotion and longing to be together. That won't matter in his boss' eyes.

I am awake and rolling out of bed. My eyes are half open and I can't stop yawning as I make a cup of coffee. While the coffee brews, I power up the laptop and stare at the flashing cursor wondering what I want to write today. Nothing comes to mind, yet my mind is flooded with thoughts. Which task do I take? Do I just sit here and write aimlessly in hopes of something interesting pops into my mind? At least I am writing though it makes not a lick of sense. But how often does writing make sense? If published, more often than none. But daily blah is normal for me. Not everything in life makes sense. Nor should it. If everything in life made sense, boredom would come so quickly and time would pass slowly. The mystery of life is what keeps us going. Wondering what's in store for us each day. Whether it makes for soundless sleep or tossing and turning. Regardless of which, it's time to get going enjoy the beautiful sunny day that lies ahead.

Black-eyed Peas to the Rescue

Celebrating New Years Day with black-eyed peas has been a tradition in my family for as long as I can remember. It is said that a spoonful of black-eyed peas can make or break your luck.

Last New Year, 2012, I somehow forgot to eat that spoonful of black-eyed peas. On the first day of 2012, the Wii crashed. The next day it was my phone. Then the next, my computer. (Thank goodness it wasn't my laptop.) It seemed every day in January of 2012, something was replaced or thrown away. On the positive side, I can say that I have lots of new items that shouldn't break too soon! 

While everything around me was breaking, I was preparing for my wedding in May. Thank goodness the groom didn't crash! It was a stressful start to the new year and I tried desperately to take it with a grain of salt. Though 2012 was a year for replacements, it was also a wonderful year with my fiancee/husband. We experienced many struggles together on top of the electronic issues and it only strengthened our bond.

It's New Year's Eve of 2012 and I'm relaxing on the sofa reading a book until it's time to run an errand. I'm not really wanting to go, but I must. It's been scheduled. I look up at the clock and sigh as I close the book. I walk up the stairs, grab my keys and enter the garage. I hop in my car, put the key in the ignition and nothing. No way! This can't be happening! The car is a 2008 and only has 36,000 miles. I've only owned it for a year and a half. I tried again. No power. I tried to pull the key out of the ignition but it wouldn't budge. I check to make sure it's all the way in in park, but even the shifter is locked into place. "What a fabulous end to the year," I whispered sarcastically.
I'm clueless on cars and the factory warranty had expired. I am at a loss for words. I walked into the house, cancelled my appointment and tried to call the hubby. But his phone went straight to voice mail. His battery was just about dead when he left for work. I shrugged and made dinner.

When he arrived at home and heard the news, he went out to the garage and unhooked the battery to get it replaced. He arrived five minutes after closing time. My car would just have to wait until New Year's Day. Though I was frustrated, I was thankful that my husband brought his suburban home from his parents house the week before which gave us a third vehicle. At least I know that if my car decides to RIP, I still have a vehicle to drive and work was only three minutes away.

On New Year's Day, I made a corn salsa dip that included black-eyed peas. I had almost forgotten the importance of black-eyed peas until my car chose to stay resting in the garage. Not only did I enjoy a bowl of this dip, I had my son deliver a jar to some of our neighbors.

At noon, while making chili, my husband began to finish the business he started with my car. Within half an hour I heard the engine revved and I peeked my head in the garage. I cheered happily because this was a great beginning to a new year! When he came inside, not only did I smother him with kisses, but I made him eat his spoonful of black-eyed peas. Reluctantly, after he ate his bite of the corn salsa dip, he told me that he saved over fifty dollars with his employee discount when he purchased the new battery. That made it even better!

Day two and I had to fill a prescription. Our joint insurance began on the first and I only hoped that my ninety prescription would be cheaper. It was by forty-five dollars! Not only that, but there was a nine month coupon of thirty dollars which brought it down to fifteen dollars!

This year we are cheering on the New Year of savings! Thank goodness for those black-eyed peas!

A Couples New Year and Resolution

On New Year's Eve, I slip into the dress that will cause my cowboy's mouth to drop open and eyes pop out of his head. My hair falls down my shoulders to the middle of my back in loose curls and my makeup covers any blemish noticeable to myself. The necklace was a gift from my cowboy two years ago and has earrings to match. I pick out a pair of four inch stilettos and walk out of my room and into the kitchen.

My heart beats a little faster as I walk down the stairs to the basement. He's playing Spec Ops on the Xbox. I wonder if I will divert his attention.

I don't have to wonder long as he stands almost instantly once he catches sight of me. There was no question whether I caught his attention as his lustful eyes devour me as he approaches. His hand slides through my hair and he grabs the back of my head. His lips smother mine in a seductive and sensual kiss. My heart races as his hand slides down the small of my back and he pulls me in tighter. I wrap my arms around his head never wanting this kiss to end.

A moment passes and he looks into my eyes. "I love you," he says and kisses my nose. "Hubba, hubba."

I giggle. "I love you too, cowboy," I say gazing into his eyes. He gathers me into a warm embrace and we stand holding each other longer than the kiss. This has been a hard year for us down to this very last day. Yet it was also the happiest year as we vowed to keep our promise to love one another through the good and the hard times.

He leads me to the blanket in front of the glowing fireplace. A platter of chocolate covered strawberries, a bottle of Champagne and two glasses sat awaiting our arrival. At first we are silent watching the New Years Eve special on Kake. But then the silence is broken by the appearance of Pitbull and our normal chatter begins. We indulge in the juicy ripe strawberries and wait for the clock to chime down, laughing and talking about nothing important. Spending quality time enjoying each others company.
"Next year, we'll go out on the town," he promises.
"Next year we may be in the hospital awaiting the arrival of our child," I tell him. "You never know, we could have the new years baby." I wink. He grabs my hand and squeezes it.

Time is winding down to those final minutes and he pops the cork. My glass overflows and I laugh holding it over the platter. My hand is sticky and my glass now is half full. That is all I need to bring in the New Year. We engage in a kiss, forgetting to count down the last seconds of the evening. Outside, fireworks burst out wildly. But we cannot stop kissing.

"Happy New Year," he says to me.
"Happy New Year," I say beaming back at him.

In this moment, we know the perfect resolution for us.
Our couple's resolution: To spend at least twenty minutes conversing of things that are not work related, child related, or news related. But, to spend at least twenty minutes each day reminiscing, dreaming, or just talking about us and our love for each other.
We already wake up each morning and thank God for letting us cross paths. Now we will spend time showing our devotion to one another.

Sneakl Peek!!

Gabriela Whitley: The Rise of the Kingdom

The Vampire stepped out of the woods at sunset and headed for the Bistro, clearly playing over every word her angelic voice spoke in his mind. Only hours from now, he would perch himself in the tree and listen to her read. At least he hoped she would. He stopped suddenly as the rich eucalyptus scent filled the air around him. He turned swiftly and followed it, down the sidewalk and across the busy street, pushing through the rushing crowd of people near the entrance to the bookstore.  

            When he walked in, Gabriela was scanning her finger over the titles of the same bookshelf. He camouflaged himself in the leaves of the silk dragon tree in the far corner of the café and closed his eyes and concentrated on listening to her voice. 

“Oh, which one is this?  No, I have already read that one.  This one looks good. Vampire Theories Volume 1.  Hmm,” she said, pulling the thin black book with red lettering on the spine off the shelf.  There wasn’t an image on the front of the book, just a cursive script dripping down the book like blood. “This looks interesting,” she thought and flipped the book over to read the back cover.

            “No, not that one. I’ve read it and it’s quite boring for your taste,” he thought.

She gasped and dropped the book, looking around her. 

He froze. “Impossible.”

            “What,” she said, frantically.  “Where are you?”  She looked around drawing attention from others wandering near her, gaining looks of confusion.  “Did you say something?” she asked the man with long dark hair pulled back into a ponytail. He glanced up at her, and then looked from one side to another, then back at her, his eyebrows wrinkled.

            “Um, no ma’am,” he said, shaking his head and walking away.

            “I’m losing it,” she said and laughed nervously. She shook her head and put the book back on the shelf and walked out of the bookstore. The vampire followed, keeping his distance.

Gabriela turned cautiously on the sidewalk, glancing around her. An eerie sensation swept over her that someone was watching her, following her. She could still feel a presence in her mind as if someone was tapping into her thoughts.  Quickly, she made her way into a crowd of people, walking with them towards the street that would lead her home. 

The Vampire slowed his pace. He knew he could communicate with other vampires, but it was an exhausting task. With her, he was at ease and energized. “Unbelievable, how could she hear me,” he thought.

            “Who is this?” She shrieked.  “Where are you?  Why can’t I see you?”  She looked around anxiously as she walked through the center of the plaza, still surrounded by people walking to the shops that lined the street.  As she neared the Bistro at the end of the plaza, her heartbeat quickened, knowing soon she would be alone.

            The Vampire spoke to her gently in his mind, “I do not wish to harm you.” He watched as she looked from one side to another walking quickly, yet cautiously.  He could feel her fear. Her heart raced pumping the blood harder and faster through her veins.  His mouth watered and his throat burned.  

People passed her by, glancing at her curiously from over their shoulders, shrugging and continuing on with their agendas.  She did not know whether to run or hide.

            “Hiding would be pointless, Gabriela,” he said gently.  Oops. 

            “You know my NAME!” 

She ran passed a large group of people almost knocking down a girl close to her age.

            “Hey!  Watch where you're going,” she snapped, shaking her fist at Gabriela.

            “Please stop running so I can introduce myself.” The vampire quickened his pace.  “Look behind you to your right; I am not far.”

            She slowed to a walk and looked over her right shoulder. A very tall man, who stood out from the crowd, in a casual dark gray suit moved swiftly and elegantly towards her.  Her pace slowed to a stop. Her eyes widened and her mouth dropped open. The stranger looked enchanting yet mysterious the way he glided towards her, his feet barely touching the sidewalk.  He was intriguingly handsome. His hair, a rich dark brown that curled loosely, wildly sexy, flowing in every direction. 

He held his hands out in front of him as he approached her. She gazed into his emerald green eyes, entranced. She was under his spell, unable to look away, unable to stop herself from walking toward him.  He looked away at once.

After a moment, she shook her head.  “What was that,” she asked. A tremor of fear rose inside her as he stood an arm length away.

            “Gabriela, I do not mean to frighten you.”  He did not gaze into her eyes as he did a few minutes before, knowing she could easily be his next victim.  She intrigued him and he wanted to know more about her rather than her becoming his next meal.